- Her Truth -

I'm back . You guys know the drill . So here it is , the song I have been listening to way too much these few days . The beginning part is my absolute favorite : " What's the trick ? I wish I knew . I'm so done with thinking through all the things I could've been . And I know you wonder too. All it takes is that one look and I'll fall right back to you . You cross the line and it's time to say F you . What's the point of saying that ? When you know how I'll react . You think you can just take it back but shit just don't work like that . You're the drug that I'm addicted to and I want you so bad . Guess I'm stuck with you and that's that . "  This entry will be a short one , a very short one indeed . I just dropped by to jot down how contented I feel right now . Though not completely settled down like I wish to but still , I'm tremendously grateful for how I feel now as compared to how I was a few months b...

" I've been walking through a world gone blind , can't stop thinking of your diamond mind . Careful creatures made friends with time . He left her lonely with a diamond mind , and those ocean eyes . " - Ocean Eyes by Billie Eilish  How would you interpret these lyrics ? I'm fascinated as to what lyrics mean to each individual . Regardless of the actual meanings and stories set by the composers and singers themselves . I guess each and every one of us tend to whip up our own batch of stories that goes along with songs we listen to throughout our life time . These stories may be of memories , mixture of delicate personal emotions or even invaluable life lessons and ecetera . All of these intertwined , opens up a path of untold stories and indecipherable meanings behind each songs , depending on each individual . Ain't it unique and somewhat .....  ludicrous ? To think of it like this ? The song that we listen to now , how we comprehend it , may not be it for ...

It's such a difficult decision for me to pick out a song that I really love for this entry as I'm really into a couple of songs these few weeks . This week I'm immensely touched by You Are The Reason by Calum Scott   . I first heard this song on the radio while I was driving , it sent chills down my spine . I couldn't really pin point how I felt back then , a confusing rush of nostalgia , hurt but ironically , a hint of comfort . So here it is : - Awakening of Senses  I could feel again . Feel again . Such a huge step in such a short amount of time . It might sound bizarre to any sane being that I'm applauding myself for the simple mechanism that should be equipped within a human being . But as I've mentioned in earlier entries , specifically , Emotional Numbness from 13th July 2018   . I've gone through a phase where I could nearly feel nothing . I guess I was so wounded up in my own hurt feelings that I was entirely numb wh...

" You're a world away , somewhere in the crowd ,  in a foreign place ,  are you happy now ? "  - Happy Now by Zedd , Elley Duhe  This part of the whole song hits me the most . Right in the heart . Why is it so ? You're so far away from me , not only in the form of physical distance , but the distance of our hearts . " You were . "  Yes , were .  I guess I'm pretty much the type of person who would replay a song so much that it annoys the hell out of others . To be specific , I've been hooked on to this song for quite a while now . It's like a daily routine to listen to this song while I'm on my way to work . 10th August 2018 ( Friday )  After a couple of months of you repetitively asking me if I was free , that you wanted to see me , and me continuously refusing to see you . I finally felt maybe it was best for us to just sort things out once and for all . It's been half a year since our separation and I had pretty ...

 There are so many songs that I've been listening to on repeat lately and I don't really know which one I would post on my blog today . I guess Birdy's Skinny Love might be the one for this blog . I unexpectedly stumbled upon Birdy's songs on the end of June this year and I instantly got hooked onto her enchanting voice . A song that tells my tale , a short episode , a story of June . End of June to early July . A period of time I do not want to remember . I made my last attempt on spilling the beans this week , in hopes that you would at least recognize what you had done me wrong . In all honesty , I do not know what good will it bring me even if you admit what had gone wrong between us . But I guess I just wanted an answer of some sort , at least a reason to fully accept and move on with my life . Even with this simple request , my last request that I ask of you . Even with my subtle accusations , with no malicious attentions whatsoever , you chose to dodge and hi...

I See Fire by Ed Sheeran . This was the song I've listened to before you came back , it was sung by a live band in an Aussie Bar . I could still remember how I felt back then , that night . Nervous , anxious , moody , and I was telling my friend about you over a few mocktails . ( Since I was the designated driver ,  I couldn't have possibly drank cocktails however much I wanted to . ) My friend was a cheerful one . She took the little flag on the table and told me to just wave . She told me to relax for a bit , whatever happen , happens . And for good reason . She was right . Maybe all of these were the best outcomes for both of us after all . And I should really try to let go even if I really miss you , and all the good times we had . However short the time span was , it was the best memory I could ever have . You gave me the first taste of adulthood , sweet love . For the past relationships I had were of childish nature , you were the first to make me feel secure , you ma...

So per usual , here's another song that fascinated me this week . I should really name this corner so I could just label it next time without all these hefty intros . Billie Eilish's idontwannabeyouanymore . And yes,  there's no space between the song title . So last week I started working , as a waitress in a Japanese restaurant . The exact location I would prefer not disclosing as I like myself working with a bit more privacy , away from people I know . It's a very fun job . Yes yes , most of you may think what's so fun about being a waitress ? Everything about it . It's like playing dinner dash , in real life . And beside that , since there's a lot of Japanese customers , I'll get to brush up on my use of Japanese honorifics . It's hilarious to see Japanese people have their eyes wide opened when I started serving them using fluent Japanese , and then they'll proceed with drowning me with lots of qu...