16th March 2013
I assume that no one else but me will be able to read this post right now .
And yeah of course ,
this blog is more like a diary to me .
Well , not exactly a diary .
Some sort of space to let me record some tit-bits of my life ?
Six months has passed since my break up .
Maybe it's not a big deal for anyone else .
Including him , i guess .
He had long forgotten about us .
I can still remember every single thing we did together ,
and every memories we had .
Everything seems so close ,
so familiar ,
but no ,
it's already a past that i no longer can reach .
It feels like i had been knocked down from heaven .
It feels like i no longer have anything to live up to ,
for i found every single thing i defined as ' happiness ' in the past no longer exists as soon as he left .
For six months ,
the quote he left me startled with repeats in my mind .
' Short pain is better than a long one . '
Yes , it indeed is .
But had he ever realize that the time needed to cure the wound on a person's heart depends on every individual?
And even though it heals ,
there will still be ,
an ugly remaining scar .
They won't fade .
They never will .
I appreciate his effort to minimize the pain for me .
But really , is it that easy for me to forget someone i love with my whole heart ?
The answer is painstakingly obvious ,
NO.
I feel sorry that he had to endure all the pointless argues i had put him into ,
and all the pain he went through with all my sarcasms .
If there is another chance ,
which there won't be ,
i want to tell him how much i love him, and how much i still do .
And the fact that i am really sorry for not being a good girlfriend .
I kind of messed up with his life , did'nt i ?
Recently ,
I have heard of rumors about him .
About girls .
About he having another crush and all sorts of stuffs .
Jealousy takes over me .
But the truth tells me that ,
who am i to be jealous ?
We're strangers .
Yes ,
our shoulders pass like nothing ever happened between us .
Forgetting someone is hard and if i really want to ,
i will have to take up to an arduous journey .
But i chose not to .
I just don't know why .
Maybe i just want everything to stay how it is in my mind ?
At least i still remember .
That's why they say love is blind .
Maybe it really is .
It's having effect on me right now .
Two weeks more to Trial examination .
These rumors are disturbing my thoughts .
And yeah of course ,
this blog is more like a diary to me .
Well , not exactly a diary .
Some sort of space to let me record some tit-bits of my life ?
Six months has passed since my break up .
Maybe it's not a big deal for anyone else .
Including him , i guess .
He had long forgotten about us .
I can still remember every single thing we did together ,
and every memories we had .
Everything seems so close ,
so familiar ,
but no ,
it's already a past that i no longer can reach .
It feels like i had been knocked down from heaven .
It feels like i no longer have anything to live up to ,
for i found every single thing i defined as ' happiness ' in the past no longer exists as soon as he left .
For six months ,
the quote he left me startled with repeats in my mind .
' Short pain is better than a long one . '
Yes , it indeed is .
But had he ever realize that the time needed to cure the wound on a person's heart depends on every individual?
And even though it heals ,
there will still be ,
an ugly remaining scar .
They won't fade .
They never will .
I appreciate his effort to minimize the pain for me .
But really , is it that easy for me to forget someone i love with my whole heart ?
The answer is painstakingly obvious ,
NO.
I feel sorry that he had to endure all the pointless argues i had put him into ,
and all the pain he went through with all my sarcasms .
If there is another chance ,
which there won't be ,
i want to tell him how much i love him, and how much i still do .
And the fact that i am really sorry for not being a good girlfriend .
I kind of messed up with his life , did'nt i ?
Recently ,
I have heard of rumors about him .
About girls .
About he having another crush and all sorts of stuffs .
Jealousy takes over me .
But the truth tells me that ,
who am i to be jealous ?
We're strangers .
Yes ,
our shoulders pass like nothing ever happened between us .
Forgetting someone is hard and if i really want to ,
i will have to take up to an arduous journey .
But i chose not to .
I just don't know why .
Maybe i just want everything to stay how it is in my mind ?
At least i still remember .
That's why they say love is blind .
Maybe it really is .
It's having effect on me right now .
Two weeks more to Trial examination .
These rumors are disturbing my thoughts .
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